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TWINKIES 5, TIGERS 1

Mike Pelfrey was KO'ed in the second inning by the murderous Twins offense, featuring Kenys Vargas, Max Kepler and Brian Dozier.  Curiously, the MLB.com wrap characterized the Tigers as "neck and neck with the Blue Jays for the second Wild Card spot."  Actually the Jays are in the first spot and the Tigers are -2.0 games behind the Orioles for the second spot.  But what's a couple of games in this situation.

Detroit +10 games over .500, with a 27% playoff shot per Fangraphs.

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RAYS 7, BALMER 6

Evan Longoria hit a 3-run homer in the top of the first, but Matt Weiters and J.J. Hardy both answered with 2-RBI hits in the bottom of the first.  Dissatisfied with his efforts to botch the game, Yovani Gallardo went back to work with a vengeance.  He coughed up another run in the second, another one in the third and then self-ignited a fourth Tampa rally before the Orioles called the dogs off themselves.

Baltimore +14 ahead of .500, two full games ahead of SEATTLE and Detroit with 18 games left to play.  They've got a 46% chance of winning a Wild Card spot and a 58% chance of the playoffs if you include their chance of passing Boston.

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GO DIRECTLY TO JAIL, DO NOT PASS GO, DO NOT COLLECT BEATINGS FROM SECOND DIVISION CLUBS

The Mariners, who utterly failed to lose on their day off Thursday, are -2.0 to the Orioles in the second slot and also -2.0 to the Jays in the first slot.  Meaning that the Mariners are now welcome to catch either ballclub, whichever plays worse -- and neither club finishes with four Orc-steak sandwiches as Moe pointed out.

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Extended Play, Dept.

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The Jays, in fact, get *US* in Safeco, the last game being one of those yellow-shirt screaming fan days.  Who'da thunk they'd be fighting for their lives in that series.  If they survive that, they get NYY-Bal-Fenway.

M's playoff chances sit at 32.6% (!!) as we head into Felix and Zeus.  Let me savor that last phrase again.  Playoff race, twin aces up the next two days.  I think I'm going to cry.

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ALL HAIL THE KING

Playoff atmosphere, yellow shirts everywhere.  Here y' go, Felix.  This is what you been saying you wanted, the last ten years or so.  We ain't expecting much.

Be Afraid,

Dr D