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LOL!
That is actually hilarious considering the context. I use sabermetrics to determine player intelligence. It's things like CS%, defensive efficiency, assist rates, O-SW%, O-CT% and BB/K for me...smart players do everything they can to get the most out of their abilities. Dumb players just get by on being better than their opponent. Upton is a quintessential dumb player with his bad BB/K, bad O-SW%, bad O-CT%, mediocre defense considering his awesome defensive tools and poor baserunning.