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Supposing I trusted this kind of fuzzy math (I don't)...the first thing I'd do is drop the nonsense with R and RBI. A player certainly has some control over his average RBI and R production, but year to year fluctuations? No. Sorry.
I would also adjust the BABIP section so that it did not just account for HRs but speed score as well. It is known that speedy guys hit for a high adjusted BABIP for obvious reasons.
Finally, I think his age section needs to be position-specific. If you're a catcher, the odds of decline begin increasing by age 30. If you're a first baseman...it's more like age 34 or 35...if you're a DH...more like 38. This needs to be accounted for.