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Hey Matt,
Its still fun to talk some chess with you. The only time I hear about Nystagmus is in DUI defense. That is, the allegedly drunk .10 eyeball has a narrow field of vision and tends to twich and spazz out when anything happens out of the narrow field of vision. The more drunk your eyeball gets, the worse the nystagmus. Permanent beer goggles sounds like it would cause quite a few problems with everyday life. How is driving, playing video games, or talking to strange women? (Sorry couldn't help it).
See ya buddy.